Friday, March 26, 2010

Happy Weekend...

This week seemed to scream by. I was looking forward to sharing some things I have had on my mind but, alas, the weekend has come and there are new adventures to be had.  There is always next week... good intentions, good intentions, everyone.

Right now I am staring at laundry that needs putting away and dishes that need washing, and then putting away.  But, these blank walls and verily undecorated house of mine is calling out, "Do something".  I have waited to do much with my home because I have very large decor from my old home and also, because my tastes have tweaked a bit.  I still like the rustic, Tuscan decor but I can not escape all of the color that is invading my style.  It makes me feel as if I have deprived myself of color for a very long time and have not been true to my inner designer that wants a lovely blend of colors spread throughout my humble little cottage.  While I have good intentions, People, the house still goes neglected.  I often wonder about those of you who have immaculate homes... and kids... do you ever sleep?  I guess that is my problem... I really like to sleep.  I don't like sleeping in but I do like about 8 hours, no more.  Which brings me to my next topic...

Luciloo!  Why are you not sleeping through the night!?  You are 9 months old and still wanting to nurse 3 and 4 times at night!  Here lies my sleep dilemma.  Maybe if I was getting my 8, I would have a, not immaculate, but lovely enough house.  I would have all of the house work done and finances and catering work all finished and still have lots of time to play with my girls.  We would read lots of stories and build forts.  We would be ballerinas and pirates.  We would have lots of pets because there would be time to care for them.  We would design our own textiles and sew our own line of gorgeous clothing paralleling those of JCrew and Anthro.  We would make and distribute our long awaited line of wool felt hair accessories.  Our garden would be brilliant.  We would have San Marzano tomatoes which we would roast and can for a year of the best sauce ever.  We would have a plot of land and grow the best peaches ever!  Have our own dairy cow so that we could have fresh, organic milk and cheeses. We would begin and finish the BBA Challenge.  We would find some niche for something spectacular and totally corner the market!!!

Oh, the endless possibilities!  While I will follow my heart and pursue the aforementioned delights to the best of my ability, I will most likely still be folding that laundry.  At the very least, the kids did get their weekly baths.  Maybe I make this with the cannellini beans I have been soaking for not one, but 2 days now.  And I might tackle my first of Peter Reinhart's recipes tonight after the girls are in bed.

I did find some lovely fabric for the girls bedrooms.  Anna Maria always impresses me with her lovely designs.  I will be saving for quite some time but I hope to make the girls bedding.  Maybe this idea should be up two paragraphs.

I have been enjoying my girls bible study, learning to have more of a "Mary spirit".  I have always felt good about trusting God and have felt gifted in faith but He is revealing to me areas in which I am not trusting fully.  It feels really good to be back in a bible study. 

I am hoping to hit a few yard sales this weekend.  I am in search of lovely things for mere cents so hopefully I will find some treasures.  Anyone interested in coming along?  I really do not have an agenda.  The plan is to drive around aimlessly while drinking coffee, singing loudly with my girls and looking for signs.  I would be so jazzed if I found some buttery soft fabric with large and small floral print for girls room and for dresses, cake pedestals, demitasse cups with saucers, lamps for my living room, curtains for my 4 tiny kitchen windows, good knives, antique beaded jewelery, and a little tikes play thingy for the girls.  Ya never know... someone could be really excited about selling those very things for really cheap.

On a closing note (wow, I guess I had a lot to say... I am really feeling chatty this afternoon), I hope you have a very lovely and peaceful weekend with your dear ones!

Monday, March 22, 2010

speaking of life

Photo by Matthew Wright

Matthew took me on a very enjoyable date Saturday afternoon.  We went on a 5 mile hike to Lake Clementine and back.  It was lovely out so we thoroughly enjoyed the scenery and Matthew took photos as we walked and talked.  I love my children and love having them along but this was nice... I held Matthew's hand as we walked and not Evelina's for fear that she would fall off the cliff.  We talked about everything from parenting to our spiritual lives.  It was peaceful and we were able to connect... enjoyable!

As we talked, I was sharing about how Evelina has some issues with jealousy with Luciana.  I recently discussed it with a few friends and one friend suggested that maybe when I was comparing them in the spirit of discussing parenting, Evelina was listening.  I think this true and maybe, I am unknowingly releasing the spirit of competition between them.  I compare them to discuss parenting with friends but I also discovered that I have been sharing the darker side of Evelina so that my friends will show me some empathy.  I am telling people how she disobeys and how she has such an attitude sometimes so that others will feel pity for me and give me attention of sorts.

How sad!!!  I am exposing my kid so that I can receive a pat on the back!  I am sharing her faults so that my friends and others can tell me how hard it must be or that I am doing well in disciplining her.  All the while she is listening.  She is always listening.  I can not believe I actually have stooped to this level of attention-getting behavior!  I can not imagine the hurt I must cause her every time I share about her weakness and the spirit of which I share them, comparing how Luciana is mostly happy and rarely has such an attitude.  After grieving over this for the past couple days, I must say I am so grateful that it has been revealed to me while she is just three and not thirteen. 

From this point forward, I will share about her many strengths, her beautiful heart, her creative spirit, and the fire that God has blessed her with.  If I sincerely need advice in handing a situation, I need to seek help from a trusted source in confidence.  If I say her name in conversation, let it serve as a reminder that I am to speak life, as her name means "giver of life" and "joy". 

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

my bread world is about to change

I just bought this book at the recommendation of a friend (thanks J!) who knew I was cultivating a sour dough starter.  I have read the most of the instructional part and I am so impressed with how much I have learned.  It was like taking a bread making course.  I have always been fascinated with those who can bake well and I have definitely put myself out there.  I have been baking my own (well not my own recipe... I copy hers) whole grain bread for about 6 months now as well as quick breads and muffins.  I have had to practice but I am pleasantly surprised at how well it has been turning out.  I really like bread so that helps but it has been really good.  I think the only bread I have met and not liked is rye.  I pretty much like all breads.  But I also value health so Lindsay's recipe is really good for me.  I get the health quality and great taste and texture. 

I am really excited about trying Peter Reinhart's techniques!  I tend to change up a recipe before even trying it but I am really going to stick to the book here so I can learn as much as I can.  Our favorite little bakery (great spot to take your sweetie or for a girls time out - they have the BEST pastries and, well, pretty much everything I have had has been of the utmost quality!) has a quote from Karen, herself, saying something about how you can't break all of the rules in baking until you learn how to first obey them.  That is going to be my approach as I work through The Bread Baker's Apprentice.

Monday, March 8, 2010

fruit loops anyone?

We decided to make Daddy a fruit loop necklace...

but we ate it
instead : )

eat your beets

A couple of nights ago, beets were on the menu.  I thought Evelina would have no problem eating them because she really does like most foods.  She is getting pickier, however, so I thought about it ahead of time and decided I would trump any complaint with, "Don't you want to eat pink food?"  It started to work but alas, no... she wasn't going for it.  Then, quick-thinking Daddy said, "If you eat your beets, your poop will be pink!"  She scarfed them down and spent the rest of the night trying to push out pink poop.  It was not going well for her... no poop.  Her sister pooped right away and if I hadn't thought it through, I would have called 911 because it looked like she was bleeding out in her diaper. The next day, the pink poop prevailed.  The moral of the story is... when in the bathroom, there is always a pot of gold under your rainbow : P

hot... or not

There was this article in the Sac Bee about the pressure many moms feel to be "hot".  I was reading through it and agreeing with some of the points.  It is a lot of pressure to feel "hot" when you are just trying to keep everyone fed and clean, bills paid, housework done, etc.  I pretty much never feel "hot"... I don't know about you but I don't really think I want to be "hot".  It is truly the farthest thing from my mind.  Whereas I once loved fashion and still do (somewhere in there), I like the creative element behind putting together an outfit, not how "hot" other people will think I am. I suppose that is why it is so easy for me to stay in my pajamas all day... I really do not care if other people will like it or not.  The article stated that it is a woman's confidence that makes her most beautiful.  As I got towards the end of the article, I felt somewhat validated for not striving to feel "hot".  I almost felt hopeful that I was going to be let off the hook and allowed to just be me.  Until the end.  The final story shares one gal's struggle and how she got her confidence back... liposuction.  Thanks, SacBee... it appears that I can be confident, once again, if only I could get LIPOSUCTION.  WHAT?!!!  Clearly, this article needs a bit of proofing!  Nothing like changing your mind in the middle of your article!  Try staying true to your thesis!!!